Description
Schizophrenic Stoner Wisdom Hat – Shut Up & Get Schooled
Product Description:
Step aside, TED Talks. This hat is the mic-drop moment your closet’s been missing. Introducing the “Schizophrenic Stoner Is Talking” hat – a bold embroidered PSA for when you’re high, enlightened, and two dimensions deep in a conspiracy involving ducks, aliens, and your neighbor’s Wi-Fi.
Whether you’re dropping galaxy-brain theories or just vibing with the voices, this crispy white cap demands silence from the crowd and respect for the professor. Complete with two red “no talking” icons so even the illiterate get the message: Shhh… a legend is speaking.
Perfect for:
• Hotboxing your truth
• Campfire rants that start with “bro…”
• Collecting secondhand stares at gas stations
Materials:
• 100% Cotton (and 0% judgment)
• Embroidered text that screams louder than you ever need to
Care Instructions:
Hand wash cold. Air dry. Never wash off the wisdom.
Disclaimer: Listening may cause third-eye activation, spontaneous giggling, and a sudden urge to explain the simulation theory to your cat.
